Beyond Let Them and Let Me: Why We Need "Let Us"

What if the bestselling self-help advice of the year is only telling you two-thirds of the story? This episode expands Mel Robbins's viral Let Them Theory. Alongside "Let Them" and "Let Me," you’ll learn a third, essential move: Let Us. 

Using real examples from healthcare, education, and immigration policy in Texas, it presents what it looks like to widen our emotional health beyond the personal and into the communal. 

You can come away with a fuller framework for emotional well-being — one that doesn't stop at personal boundaries but extends into neighborly action. 

Take a few minutes to discover what "Let Us" could look like in your own neighborhood this week.

Transcript

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Hey friends, welcome to Tracks for the Journey. This episode is about an overlooked component of well-being and emotional health. In fact, I think one of the biggest names in America has missed the power of this factor in making a good life possible. Mel Robbins, the Let Them Theory, has sold millions of copies and filled the airwaves. It's a great book about living well, but she has missed a vital component of emotional health. I call this component the Let Us Theory, and it will make a difference in your life satisfaction. Now I enjoyed Robin's book. In fact, I recommended it to several of my counseling clients. The book has two components we can look at briefly. It's about focusing our emotional energy on the one thing we can control, our feelings, thoughts, and actions. The first part is let them, meaning the choice when stressed about a social situation, to give up our efforts to control and change the other person. That really is impossible, so we decide to let them have their behavior or their opinion. We may prefer that the neighbor not play loud music for his Saturday evening backyard party, but we let him have his space rather than marching to the front door and demanding he cut down the volume. The second part is let me. Pausing to allow our emotions to settle, we choose our reaction. When we control ourselves, the only things we can fully control, we're empowered to use our own values, potential, and energy. With the loud music situation, we can develop alternatives, watching a movie indoors, listening to our own music on our earphones, or going out for the evening with friends to a good restaurant. All this is good and worth following for our emotional stability. But I want to add the missing ingredient. I believe we must have a third component, the let us component. The let us mantra declares that we can choose to join my energy with others for the good of the community. It acknowledges that we don't live in a bubble. Instead, our personal situation and single family are impacted from every direction by the community and the culture. Now this isn't a new idea. It's the imperative of Scripture to love our neighbor as ourselves, lived at the scale of a whole community. Cain's impertinent question to God about Abel, Am I my brother's keeper? gets a clear yes. We are exactly in that. The book of Ephesians reminds us that we're God's masterpiece made for good works, which we're never meant to stop at our own front door. The words of this third component declare a big vision. Let us make a better world. Of course, it seems to be easier to live in our own bubble. We can create our own world with only the people and groups we want, choose to watch only our favorite TV shows and movies, and go to the church that suits our preferences. But in reality, we can't escape the influence of what's happening in our city, state, nation, and the world. The evidence of this truth is as close as the gas station, grocery store, schoolroom, and yes, what happens on our TV each day. Let me apply this mantra to the situation in the state where I live. You can apply it to your own situation. In Texas, my health care is affected by the failure of the legislature to support hospitals for rural communities, banning doctors from offering critical care to women, and slashing support for affordable medical insurance. The education of my children and grandchildren suffers because the state has funded private schools instead of public districts. My Hispanic friends are living in fear about the unfairly targeting by ICE for brutal arrests by untrained, masked agents with no opportunity for due process. To have the best life, it's time to say let us build a community that's free and equitable and affordable for everyone. In another example, Texas has the highest uninsured rate, creating a human toll of economic costs that will last for decades. So let us change this. And then I must mention that Texas companies have failed to provide workers with healthy conditions and wages that provide a living wage. Estimates are that 40% of Texas households cannot afford adequate housing, health care, and bill assets for the future. Let us change this. And then finally, Texas companies have failed to guard the environment through reliance on fossil fuels, failure to reduce factory pollution, and evading regulations. Let us change this. You get the drift. No matter where you live, let them and let me have a role in your emotional health. But taking the next step, let us expand our vision to make our community a better place for everyone. So what does let us look like this week? It can be actions like showing up at a school board meeting, a neighborhood cleanup effort, or a food pantry shift. It can be learning who represents you and telling them what you're seeing in your neighborhood that they can't see from the faraway state capitol or even Washington, D.C. It can be as simple as asking a neighbor how they're really doing and taking time to listen. In fact, the let us isn't a theory at all. It's a way of living with love for God and our neighbor that makes our world a better place. So thanks for making this episode a part of your day. Your review and your rating will help me reach others with resources for well-being. You can also support what I'm doing through my website, tracksforthejourney.com. Thanks so much for being a part of Listening Today, and may your journey be filled with well-being.