Your DIY Faith Isn’t Enough: Helps from My 50 Years of Ministry

What if the most important relationship on your spiritual journey isn't with a book, a doctrine, or even a church? It could be one wise person willing to walk beside you.

In a culture of DIY religion, I offer reasons why spiritual mentorship is vital, based on my 50 years of ordained ministry. I share some of my journey and examples from history to help you find the mentor you need.

I talk honestly about ordination in today’s faith traditions, marked by uneven standards across denominations, and the ongoing exclusion of women and LGBTQIA+ people from ministry.

I think you’ll come away with a clearer sense of what to look for in a spiritual guide and the encouragement to go find one, whatever your tradition or season of life.

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If you don't have a spiritual mentor, guide, or guru, you're missing a vital component of well-being. I know this statement flies in the face of our individualistic culture where anyone can put together a DIY religion. But stay with me for a few minutes and let me explain why having a guide can bolster your spiritual life. Hey friends, I'm Larry Payne, your host of Tracks for the Journey and Signposts for the Journey. I appreciate you listening to this episode because I think it can make a big difference in your spiritual life. I've been thinking about all this because August 2026 is the 50th anniversary of my ordination as a minister. In these decades I've worn several hats of clergy vocation. I've been a senior pastor, a chaplain, a licensed counselor, and a denominational executive. People have looked to me for help in their faith journey and what an honor and responsibility this has been, and I've never taken it lightly. But what is it about your spiritual journey that needs a guide? Well, one factor I'd have you consider is the centrality of religion for life. Religious values are inseparable from our values and our moral decisions. They connect us to a community, they give comfort in our sufferings and hope as we face death. Millions find personal faith as vital as food and drink, an everyday experience that brings meaning. I remember and you probably do too, the example of President Biden, a devout Catholic who attended Mass every week no matter how much the business of running the country pressed in on him. Another factor that makes a mentor important is the complexity of religion. Just pick a question about God, humanity, truth, or the afterlife, and you can find thousands of opinions debated through the centuries. History shows these debates have sometimes become bloody encounters tinged with the dark stains of hate, and we cannot tolerate this in our present age. At the same time, we cannot merely ignore the great questions of life just because they're complex and hard to understand. For instance, if a person believes that God has already decided who will go to heaven and who will go to hell, they may simply shrug their shoulders in resignation about how to really live and thrive. One, on the other hand, who holds the future as open, yet to be decided, will find adventure in the wonder of every day's opportunity. Let me tell you a personal story. My wife and I visited Istanbul several years ago. We hired a personal guide to take us around the city for a few hours. His expertise made traveling through that bustling city easier, and he shared with us the stories that made it such a crossroads of Europe. It was an exciting day because we had a guide. And even ordering food from the Turkish menu was easy with him as the interpreter. I suggest that having a guru, a guide, a mentor, a spiritual director is going to be so helpful for you in your spiritual life. Now let me backpedal just a moment to talk about the subject of ordination. I mentioned it's been fifty years since I was ordained. In my Baptist tradition, this is handled by the local church. There are no specific qualifications or training required to prepare for ordination. I had the privilege of attending seminary, and I had served in some small ministry positions before I went through that ceremony. In other traditions, ordination requires years of study and supervised training, and I really believe that's a better path than one church merely deciding because they like somebody and they think he can talk pretty well who should receive this important designation. Now let me make plain in my Baptist tradition, ordination does not convey any spiritual authority, and I've been reminded of that fact many times in these five decades of service. Now it's really sad if I can stay on this subject just for a moment, that ordination is a source of conflict in a religious life today. Some religious groups have decided to exclude women and LGBTIA persons from ordination. No matter how dedicated, educated, or talented a woman may be, she's excluded from the central roles of leadership in these denominations. You know, a person a woman may fly to the moon, may serve on the Supreme Court, may be a brain surgeon, but not preach or serve the Eucharist. Please permit me to say that, in my opinion, this policy really is unbiblical. It's bigoted and frankly not very wise. If you're a part of such a church, please consider finding a new and inclusive family of faith. Now let me return to your faith journey. Your spiritual life will be deepened if you find a wise guide to bolster your growing faith and well being. Now notice that I said a wise guide, not simply one who has the credentials, education, or position. Those provide important foundations, but I'm suggesting you should find a person who adds a crucial component, wisdom that connects with real life. That guide may be called a pastor, a priest, spiritual director, a guru, a bishop, a nun, or a professor. It doesn't make any difference what their title is, for you are looking for a person who lives with integrity and love. Look for the one who will turn your heart to those deep questions, to those vital practices, and this is important, hold you accountable in wrestling with the hard questions for your life and how you believe and act. Think for a moment about Jesus and how he worked with the apostles. The gospel's made plain he acted as a rabbi who gathered followers who wanted to share his wisdom and mission. That was a common practice in first century Judaism, and Jesus, taught by example, he taught by his own faith experience, he taught this band of men and women patiently instructing them in a new way of life. He challenged them to see faith in a larger dimension than they had ever considered. Now you won't find a Jesus figure for your guide. In fact, if one claims to have all the true answered in their teaching, run the other way. Progressive theology, let me talk about that for a moment because I think it brings a special insight to your process of growth. Progressive theology embraces the reality that everything evolves in dynamic interrelationship. In this love-centered theology, God is a part of this evolving universe, knowing and responding to every moment of our experience. And God is luring each of us forward to transformative choices, then moves in new ways for the next experience, always present and energizing toward abundant life. In the evolving story of world faith, God has inspired many great leaders and prophets. In Bible history, God inspired the Hebrew patriarchs, then the prophets, then Jesus, then the apostles. And throughout history, great leaders have added to this journey of faith, like Saint Francis of Assisi, John Wesley, and Martin Luther King Jr. Those have led the evolution of faith and practice under the leadership of God, and society has changed because of it. As the Gospel of John tells the story of Jesus, he said to the disciples, I am the way. And his words were inviting his little band to walk with him, and now they invite us to walk a path of transformation and enlightenment, with the living presence of God as our companion and utilizing a spiritual mentor. I was unfortunate in the years before my ordination to have a wise pastor who inspired me. John Wright was a lifelong learner, and he opened my eyes to the Bible and a way of life that moved me to try and help others. Then later a college professor Dan Holcomb stretched my faith towards real scholarship and ministry in the local church. From history, consider the story of John Wesley just for a moment. He was the founder of the Methodist Church, but in his early spiritual life he was deeply unsettled in his faith. Despite serving as a missionary, his beliefs had not brought peace or a satisfying way of life. He met a man of fervent convictions named Peter Bowler. They had long conversations about following God, and Bowler challenged him to keep searching. This influenced Wesley to attend a meeting of the Moravian Church, where he had a life-changing experience with God. Wesley and Bowler remained friends for the rest of their lives to support each other and to prompt greater walks of faith and service around the world. So back to your life and to mine. All of us face big questions. What's my purpose? What am I afraid of the most? And how can I truly love others? And what's the image of God that I hold dear and has it helped me or not? And how can I serve others and make the world a better place? Those questions, it's vital for us to find a person who will look us in the eye and listen until we find some tentative answers for these profound questions. Then that person can pay attention to the action and keep us accountable for faith that evolves as life goes on. Now as I close this idea of a mentor and challenge you, I want to recall an amazing promise in the book of Hebrews, which declares that those who seek God will be rewarded. Finding someone who will help your seeking, help your searching, help your discovery of answers can make all the difference for your spiritual life. No matter how far you've traveled on the journey of faith, now is the time to seek a guide who will take you to some new lands and make greater discoveries. This may take some effort and discernment on your part to figure out who that could be and whether they can help you in your current season of life. But this is worth the effort to find a friend who can guide you, help you, hold you accountable, and inspire you. The joy of living your faith is something you don't want to give up. And every effort you make to find that kind of mentor will be rewarded in a rich way. Thank you for joining me for these few minutes, and I hope you'll comment and add your review of what I've said, but even more, I hope you'll contact me and let's work together to find a spiritual mentor. You can email me directly at connectfj at yahoo.com. That's connectfj at yahoo.com. I invite you to be in touch as we continue to grow together in our faith and watch for those tracks for the journey that will inspire and help us.